Not a peep out of
Gingersnap yesterday.
I might be on an
emotional downswing from lack of sleep and backing off on my mood stabilizers.
Please Note: I also
take blood thinners, the mood stabilizers were causing my clotting disorder to
fluctuate to a dangerously high risk of blood clots. So, I backed off on the
mood stabilizers in an effort to normalize out the efficiency of my blood thinners.
I woke up thinking
about putting Gingersnap in the 72-hour no-contact hold. Where I don't reach
out to him for three whole days and if I don't receive a message from him, I
give up.
That's give up as in
'stop feeling'.
*sigh*
Today I feel like I
let my emotions get away from me yesterday. But, the positive side effect of
those emotions is that I'm back on track with my health and weight loss goals.
I upped my yoga and fitness routines and I actually started tracking my calories
again this morning.
So… conundrum time…
When it was
Mahogany, I was willing to accept that it wasn't going to go anywhere. Hell, I
even feel that way about the Dragon most of the time. I still *used* the
emotional upswing to propel myself forward. So, if that's all Gingersnap turns
out to be, that's not so bad, right?
*dusts off shoulder*
Yeah. I've been here
before.
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