Bran worked late
last night and I waited up so I could talk to him. So, I got to bed an hour
late.
I hit the snooze
button until 8:30 this morning, which is something I never do.
I'm still tired.
I need to not make a
habit out of this kind of behavior.
--
I may have a guest
dropping by for a very short bit… hopefully I can get the energy to pick up the
apartment a little bit.
Mental Health / Unfuck
Yourself:
- Therapy - / -
Writing - Despite my feelings that the writing just wasn't going to be
there for me yesterday, I wrote a little over 1K.
Make no mistake,
it's pure crap. I sped through my page turner hook and it's so quick and dirty
that it just takes this vicious turn that makes literally no sense.
This is a narrative
that is being posted as pure stream of thought consciousness writing. It's pure
and unpolished. It's rough draft at its finest.
Whatever.
It seems to be doing
it's job, though.
The Ghost Story is
putting energy out into the universe that I don't have the strength to put out
right now. Since it's pulling from a different place inside me, a place that
has endless reserves, my sexual fantasies… it's fueled by something other than my
need to pull sweeties and snuggle buddies close to me.
Potential sweeties
are responding.
Now I just need to
hold it together and stop whining long enough to let someone get close.
- Sleep /
Fitbit - Readings are muddled by my snoozing while I was watching a
movie on the couch last night.
- Fur-babies -
Nothing new to report.
Physical Health / Unfuck
Yourself:
- Caffeine - I
may actually go for four today.
[I'm skipping everything else today]
Relationships / Family:
- Bran - His
hours at his primary job are being fucked with because he's back from leave at
his secondary job. Everything is so messed up. I just feel like this whole
fucking thing was a mistake. He should never have left.
Well…
He's out of debt
now… that seems to be something that wouldn't have happened if he'd stayed. So,
whatever… I guess something good did come of it.
I'm a stronger
person for it, and our relationship is stronger for it.
But it fucking
sucks!
I miss him and I
want him to come back!
I just need to hold
on and hope the Ghost Stories draw some sweeties to me so I can start feeding
regularly. Then I'll be okay with all of this again.
If I can feed more,
I can start to thrive again.
- The Unicorn -
Relationships / Sweeties:
[ If you're a reader and having
trouble keeping the code named sweeties straight, look up above this entry and
below the header. There's a link to a list of names/bio's there. - this is a
work in progress, so if you're a sweetie and you don't see your name listed,
don't worry, I'll get to you. ]
- Recent
Encounters - Nothing new to report.
- Updates on
Favorites -
- Blue Falcon -
Nothing new to report.
Relationships / Potentials
and Honorable Mentions:
- The One
Timers - Last night I heard from someone I didn't expect to hear from
again.
The Dragon contacted
me.
He's down to only
one class with school and he's done the graduation walk. He has more time even
though he's working a lot. He'd fired up his OKC profile again and noticed I
was on.
He gravitated right
to me.
We're trying to make
plans again.
I want you to
understand something.
The Dragon was the
one who helped me the last time I felt this hopeless.
Hell, my ability to
even take sweeties stemmed from the Dragon!!
We didn't even have
sex.
It was just 20
minutes of him teasing me in the front seat of his car and he woke me up to
things that I'd thought were going to stay dead inside me forever.
And he contacts me
on day two of my starting a fresh Ghost Story in an attempt to reboot?
Yeah… exactly.
- The Hopefuls
- Nothing new
- Honorable
Mentions - to report.
End Notes:
I'm waking up now…
I'm actually looking
forward to the Ghost Story today.
These are good
things.
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