Monday, June 26, 2017

Show me how to be whole again...

I can't stop thinking about the Dragon.

I thought about him all of yesterday too.

This is the effect he has on me. This is the effect he's always had on me.

One date was enough to keep him fresh in my mind for months and now that I've seen him again he's all I want, again.

I really hope he doesn't cancel on me tonight.

I think he needs me as much as I need him… based on his reaction to the way I touched him.

He was sitting next to me on my bed and I started gently running my fingernails across the back of his neck. He seemed to really like it, arching his neck up into it.

Ye Gods, I hope he doesn't cancel on me tonight.

Mental Health / Unfuck Yourself:

 - Therapy - / - Writing - I was able to get the sex scene written for the Ghost Story. Now I just have to figure out how to close out the narrative. I think part 4 will be the end of it… leaving me to need something new to write tomorrow.

I'll probably rely on a writing prompt to get me somewhere.

I'm still not feeling Torvus…

Ugh… I want to be back on the main story already.

 - Sleep / Fitbit - 8 hours 1 minute, 3x awake, 17x restless, total of 34 minutes awake/restless - I still had water in my bottle when I woke up this morning. Not a lot, but not running out in the middle of the night means that I was zonked out a little better than usual. Funny how the readings are still just the same.

Also, no snooze buttons this morning. I got up when the alarm said 'get up'.

 - Fur-babies - One visit from Dreamy and Splotches yesterday. I forced Dreamy to cuddle. He protested at first and then he settled in and purred for me.

He's a good cat.

Physical Health / Unfuck Yourself:

 - Caffeine - As tired as I was when that alarm went off, I didn't go back to sleep. And I'm not even done with the first cup of coffee and I'm already mostly awake. So, I should be fine with three cups today.

I skipped everything else on the physical health report.

I know… I’m letting my physical health slip.

I just need some more time to get this depression under control and then I'll get back on top of the exercise and stuff.

Relationships / Family:

 - Bran - I'm trying to think of what we talked about last night, but nothing is coming to me. Usually he just tells me about his day at work, which is important. The 'Hi, hunny. How was your day?' - those conversations are important. He needs to know that his day mattered to someone. He needs to not come home to some terrible 'me-monster' that just wants to pout and whine about how bad their day was. He needs to feel valued for going out, working a job, and bringing home the accomplishments of a paycheck each week.

I like giving him that recognition.

He deserves it.

 - The Unicorn - In just a few short days it's going to be staycation time.  :)

I'm probably going to sleep like crap. God damn, her elbow's are sharp!

Relationships / Sweeties:

[ If you're a reader and having trouble keeping the code named sweeties straight, look up above this entry and below the header. There's a link to a list of names/bio's there. - this is a work in progress, so if you're a sweetie and you don't see your name listed, don't worry, I'll get to you. ]

 - Recent Encounters - Nothing new to report.

 - Updates on Favorites -

 - Blue Falcon - Nothing new to report.

Relationships / Potentials and Honorable Mentions:

 - The One Timers - Nothing new to report.

 - The Hopefuls - Friday checked in on me last night. Not a super lengthy conversation, but just him hoping I was okay. I didn't have much in the way of good news for him and the conversation dropped almost as soon as it started.

There are a couple of other blips on the radar. I'll let you know how those go.

I'm somewhat hopeful.

I know the Ghost Story is putting out the call that I can't right now… So, I'm very curious to see what it brings to me other than the Dragon.

Very curious, indeed.

 - Honorable Mentions - Nothing new to report.

End Notes:


I should probably check on the Dragon soon… make sure we're still on for tonight.

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