It's cool, we'll figure this out.

Every additional day in this process I come to realize that reacclimating is actually difficult and is going to take a lot more work than I initially thought.

Much of this was discussed in therapy today – so I'm just going to get on with the entry.

Mental Health / Unfuck Yourself:

- Therapy – Valkyrie tried to help me sort out as much as she could, but the harsh reality is that she's only operating with half the information and all of that told from my perspective. She's not going to be able to really help with all of this until she's able to talk it through with Bran herself.

She did her best, based on the guess work, but it was still a lot of fog for me to process.

- Writing – Maybe next week.

- Reading – Meh...

- Sleep / Fitbit – 7 hours 49 minutes, 3x awake, 13x restless, 43 minutes awake/restless.

- Fur-babies – Dreamy stopped by this morning while Bran was still asleep. Dreamy didn't mind, he just picked the spot right between us and flopped down into a big orange-crème puddle of purring fur. Bran noted that his purr is very loud, but he didn't seem too annoyed to have him there. It was a good nap time for Dreamy.

Physical Health / Unfuck Yourself:

I think Bran and I should pay the Blue Falcon back before we join a Gym. Right now Bran is living rent free, so that's an extra $300 or so in his wallet. It shouldn't take long to pay the Blue Falcon back with that.

Relationships / Family:

- Bran – Bran was so cuddly Friday and Saturday nights – but then the cuddles stopped. Valkyrie believes that this is the result of my Movie Night 'Date' with the Blue Falcon on Sunday.

It's all speculation, but here's what we've got so far.

Over a majority of the last year, I've cultivated and maintained this amazing relationship with the Blue Falcon. He's been a large part of my strength and he's kept me going. He was also the one who healed me from a massive trauma that I endured several years ago.

Bran had no such relationships. Nothing positive happened to him in the past year. So, he may be feeling some envy towards me because I was able to use this time apart to develop a support system, not just with the Blue Falcon, but with other men/lovers too.

Then, there's also the fact of those old wounds. That no matter how much Bran loved me, he couldn't touch my hurt. He couldn't make my pain go away. And then while he was gone and couldn't even be tangentially involved in the process, I met someone who was able to heal me in the way that Bran couldn't. So, It's been proposed that the Blue Falcon might be gut-punching Bran right in the insecurities in more ways than one.

Hence the 'no cuddles' since my 'date' with the Blue falcon on Sunday.

So, now it's up to me to show Bran how much he's appreciated and wanted. Somehow I need to make him understand that he's still my Number One.

Easier said than done, I’m willing to bet, but I have to try.

- The Unicorn – She has this coming Thursday and Friday off of school, so she's getting dropped off on Wednesday instead of her usual day.

Relationships / Sweeties:

- Updates on Favorites -  

- Blue Falcon – Nothing new to report.

- Sweeties -

- Bear - Nothing new to report.

 - AmbiguSweeties -

 - Pathfinder - Nothing new to report.

Relationships / Just Friends:

Nothing new to report.

End Notes:  

Bran just went on his lunch break.  

I suggested he could make it a naughty lunch break, but he turned me down. He said he needed to eat and take care of some other stuff.

It's cool, we'll figure this out.