Last night I made popcorn...

So, I spent my all Hallows exactly as intended. Huddled up under a blanket, hiding in my bedroom. LOL. Bear was there too. We finished season 1 of Dollhouse. After we're done with season 2 I'm going to get him into Sense8, that show really begs to be shared!! I don't like reading about orgies, but watching theirs are surprisingly fulfilling.

Last night I made popcorn, I shared chocolate, cuddles were had... a little play time too. It was a really good date. I enjoy his company a great deal.

He left pretty late and then it was Wild Hunt time... gah, I'm exhausted this morning. Good thing I have coffee.

Other than that... not much is going on with me this morning.

Mental Health / Unfuck Yourself:

- Therapy – I had a brief moment to tell Bran about my anxiety yesterday, but we were only on the phone for a tiny span of time during his break and he didn't get a chance to respond to my concerns. I'm not sure what he would have said... so I don't know if it would have soothed me or not.

I also shared with Bear and told him that I'm going to be extra basket casey over the next three weeks, he said he'll make an effort to be around more to help me get through it.

I'll be talking to the Blue Falcon about it tonight too.

Then, to top it off there's also the anxiety of the tooth extraction that has to happen tomorrow and I only JUST NOW realized that I don't have any way to get to the pharmacy to pick up a good pain killer if I need it. I've put in a text to Bear. I hope he can help me.

- Writing – Nano starts today, and even though I could participate (I'm alone enough) the writer's block is still going strong... I don't think Nano is ever going to happen for me again. Not unless I cheat, and then what's the point? There isn't one.

- Reading – Ye Gods! I tried reading some silly erotica that turned out to be D/s and no where even near the kind of D/s that I even like, so I ended up having to scrap it. I just couldn't continue.  

I've downloaded my next book, but didn't get a chance to read any of it yet. I'll get a chance to look at it today.

- Sleep / Fitbit – 7 hours 31 minutes, 4x awake, 14x restless, 42 minutes awake/restless. I woke up and needed to pee and get more water in the wee hours. I just couldn't wait. I knew the sky was getting light, but I had to get up. Then I crawled back into bed, hoping I'd sleep for at least another hour or so before the alarm went off.

Nope.

Like 10 minutes later, if that, LOL.

Oh well, I've got coffee.

- Fur-babies – Nothing new to report.

Physical Health / Unfuck Yourself:

- INR – Test today. If it's high then I can't have my tooth out tomorrow...

- Nervous System – Adjustment today...

Relationships / Family:

- Bran – The hardest part about all of this is a dark emotion that I had to confront yesterday.

What am I going to do if Bran comes up with some excuse to stay up north even longer? And especially with her?

I will have to question whether or not I want to remain in this relationship.

Gods, I don't want that to happen.

I really need him to come home.

- The Unicorn – Nothing new to report.

Relationships / Sweeties:

[ I took out the section on sweetie bio's, the whole 'sweetie' thing never really worked out. I only ended up with a bunch of one night stands. I'm giving up on sweeties. ]

- Recent Encounters – Nothing new to report.

- Updates on Favorites -  

- Blue Falcon – I'm excited to see him tonight... Don't know if we plan on watching any shows or if it's just going to be naked cuddles and a little play time. I’m good either way. I know we need to get through shows! But I _really_ love naked snuggles and play time!!

- Sweeties -

- Bear – This you know. We had a great time last night and I'm looking forward to seeing him again.  

He still fucking amazes me, every time we're together. I'm amazed at how much I feel for him given how much I didn't want to feel for him at first.

At first I was put off by the shell... but that inner personality of his won me over quickly and I realized that he was everything I'd ever asked the Gods for in a Sweetie. He's perfect. And yeah, he doesn't LOOK like my type... but he totally IS my type.

I'm very lucky to have him.

I'm very lucky that he wasn't satisfied to let me box him into the friend zone. I'm lucky he pushed my boundaries.  

Fuck, I'm just lucky.

We talked about him and some of his other experiences with other girls on FetLife. I told him what I saw in him in regards to his future as a potential Dominant. How he's clearly a Loving Dominant and very partner pleasure focused. He would be an AMAZING Dom for abused subs, helping them regain some of their power.

I hope I can nudge him a bit on this. It would be good for him to help people. I think it would give him a tremendous feeling of fulfillment.  

Relationships / Just Friends:

Nothing new to report.

Relationships / Potentials and Honorable Mentions:

- The One-Timers – Still no peeps out of Kohai. Valkyrie feels very strongly that he will resurface again in a few months and by that time I'll be completely over it. I'll be okay putting him in the friend zone, but I'll have no desire to see him in person again.

- The Hopefuls – OMFG! This guy on FetLife. The one who can't seem to get a clue or communicate to save his life? Yeah, I pretty much said that exactly. His excuse was that he's typing on his phone.

Fuck that noise.

I type on my phone and I still manage to sound articulate and intelligent. Fucking Bear is ALWAYS only on his phone and he opened with a 12 page message!

Ugh... there's no way I'm ever submitting to this guy.

- Honorable Mentions – Nothing new to report.

End Notes:  

I don't really have anything to say in closing.

I better just get my day started here...