I was finishing up the popcorn that I'd made for Bear and I to watch Dollhouse with, and I was spitting out the kernel bits that were too hard to chew. Then, when I was done, I could feel that there was something 'stuck' in my teeth and it wasn't coming out no matter how hard I tried. So, I went to the bathroom to take a look and omg...
Nothing was stuck in my teeth.
Part of my tooth was just gone!
My dental appointment isn't even until this coming Thursday, and that's just the consult! That's the visit where we will schedule the oral surgery. So, this could be a problem for a while yet.
I can't stop tonging it. It feels so rough and weird. I just want it to be smooth and whole again.
I think it's going to have to be soft foods for a while. No more popcorn. It's just too risky.
Mental Health / Unfuck Yourself:
- Therapy – The depression seems to be back and kicking my ass again. I'm experiencing a lot of the related lethargy. There are a number of things involved here. 1) there's still carry over from the PTSD nightmare. That did fuck me up and I knew when it happened that I was going to need a booster shot of anti-depression cuddles to get it to go away completely, and those cuddles haven't happened yet. 2) the PMS/PMDD is still a factor. Granted it's not as severe in symptoms as it was last year because I'm less stressed out, but it is still a factor.
There's not much I can do outside of self-care. Right now that means taking it easy and listening to my body. I may get those cuddles tomorrow. Kohai is still planning on making his first appearance.
Heh, yeah... we'll see how that goes.
- Writing – Still on hold.
- Reading – I think this is on hold a little bit too... Reading takes energy, and for some reason I don't even seem to have the energy to spare for that right now.
That's kinda fucked up.
- Sleep / Fitbit – Finally a normal reading!
7 hours 37 minutes, 2x awake, 16x restless, 34 minutes awake/restless.
- Fur-babies – Noting new to report.
Physical Health / Unfuck Yourself:
Blood Moon – That's all I need to say.
Relationships / Family:
- Bran – I sent him a snap yesterday telling him that he's been quiet, and I didn't get a reply. So, I'm pretty sure he's either been really busy or something's gone terribly wrong. I'm trying not to worry too much. Worrying does no good. I just need to trust him and trust that he'll come home as soon as he can.
- The Unicorn -
Relationships / Sweeties:
[ I took out the section on sweetie bio's, the whole 'sweetie' thing never really worked out. I only ended up with a bunch of one night stands. I'm giving up on sweeties. ]
- Recent Encounters – Nothing new to report.
- Updates on Favorites -
- Blue Falcon – He stopped by for all of two seconds to drop off my calcium and to give me a piece of candy, then he took off again. I didn't even get a chance to ask him to cuddle. *sad face*
For clarification: I can't have packages delivered to me. If they're left on the front stoop, they're stolen almost immediately. So, when I order things like my vitamin supplements, I get them mailed to the Blue Falcon and then he'll drop them off with me when he can.
I still wish he would have cuddled. But that's on me. I just need someone to snuggle that PTSD out of me. Which is slightly codependent of me, and I get that.
- Sweeties -
- Bear – I did text Bear last night telling him I wished I was curled up in his arms. He sent back that he missed me too. I sent him a flowery reply but then got nothing back. He was either busy or working... whatever, It's okay. I'm sure he'll make time for me soon.
Relationships / Just Friends:
Nothing new to report.
Relationships / Potentials and Honorable Mentions:
- The One-Timers – Nothing new...
- The Hopefuls - … to report.
- Honorable Mentions – I don't know if this qualifies as an honorable mention or not, but you wouldn't believe the OKC message that I woke up to this morning.
Keep in mind that my OKC profile is ALL COUGAR, all the time! There is no room for misinterpretation. I am VERY CLEARLY an older woman who is exclusively interested in younger men.
So this 24-year-old, little butter ball, messages me asking (politely, I might add) if I'm interested in younger men at all.
What?!
Okay, I know the Blue Falcon said that on dating sites men have to cast a very wide net and they don't necessarily have time to read every profile, but COME ON! At least skim the fucking thing. At least look at the little side bar where it tells you EXACTLY the age range that I'm looking for.
No, I didn't even justify it with a response.
I'm done.
I’m not trying for sweeties anymore.
Somehow Bear made it in... but he was special.
So, the door is still open, but I have to get that 'right feel' about a guy, and butter ball didn't give it.
End Notes:
I have to be really careful when eating or drinking. The tooth is seriously sensitive to hot and cold now and the salt + pepper rinse isn't working anymore. I've basically been over dosing on acetaminophen, but it seems to manage the pain well enough.
This sucks.
No comments:
Post a Comment