Strike a Pose:

I had a long chat with photographer dude yesterday. No, that's not his code name. It's just a temporary designation.

Anyway, I shared with him some of my conflicting emotions and 'pink flags' about the upcoming photo shoot and he really took the time to quell my jangled nerves about the whole thing.

Over the course of the chat we learned that we're actually quite a bit on the same page about things.

I told him that my biggest concern is that I didn't want to feel pressured to have sex with him and he told me that sex was actually the furthest thing from his mind. He's just been looking forward to this all week because winter has a way of interfering with his art.

He's also bringing wine.

I guess he has some social anxiety issues as well.

So, I am looking forward to this. We're on the same page that we want these pictures to be sensual and artful. Not kinky or raunchy. Think Playboy vs. Penthouse.

Hopefully he'll even take some that I'll like this time, LOL!!

Mental Health / Unfuck Yourself:

 - Therapy - I clocked 6 hours of game time last night. It's funny how 6 hours doesn't even nearly give me enough time to do all the things I want to do in game. I could easily have gamed for another 3 or 4 hours and then I would have been satisfied. But, no. Sleep was what was most important because I still intend to get some work done today.

 - Writing - I’m working through my critiques on Chapter 3 now… Hopefully I can make it through without having to wait another day before moving on.

 - Sleep / Fitbit - 8 hours, 2 minutes, 3x awake, 12x restless, total of 37 minutes awake/restless… fuck… pretty much the same as usual.

 - Fur-babies - Nothing new to report.

Physical Health / Unfuck Yourself:

 - Caffeine - Should be good with 3 today - especially since I ran into a snafu with my ground coffee and I need to conserve coffee pods.

 - Blood Sugar - 112 today. So that's SUPER GOOD!

 - Exercise/Yoga - Gonna have to skip it today. Sorry. I have company coming over.

Relationships / Family:

 - Bran - Still in 'nothing much to say' space… I'm sorry. It just is what it is. There's nothing I could write here that I haven't written dozens of times before. I'll let you know if anything changes.

 - The Unicorn - Nothing new to report.

Relationships / Sweeties:

[ If you're a reader and having trouble keeping the code named sweeties straight, look up above this entry and below the header. There's a link to a list of names/bio's there. - this is a work in progress, so if you're a sweetie and you don't see your name listed, don't worry, I'll get to you. ]

 - Recent Encounters - I have a 'date' today, and another tomorrow… we'll see how they go.

 - Updates on Favorites -

 - Blue Falcon - Nothing new to report.

 - Rain - Nothing new to report.

Relationships / Potentials and Honorable Mentions:

 - The One Timers - Nothing new to report.

 - The Hopefuls - So, I've met a cute and respectful kid on OKC. He seems nice. He's a bunny-dad. He's geeky. Not sure how much my type he is, but he seems super sweet. So, I'm stepping outside my social shut down mode just to meet with him. I'll let you know how it goes.

  --  Friday  -- I still think about him all the time. The connection I feel towards him is very profound. It's too bad that things on his end are preventing us from getting together. But, right now he really does need to focus on either fixing his shit or letting it break.

I've known women like the one he's dealing with. Nothing ends well with women like that.

My heart really goes out to him.

 - Honorable Mentions - Nothing new to report.

Relationships / Former Sweeties:

 - Jasper - Nothing new to report.

End Notes:

So, I guess in closing my honest hope for the days events ahead is that I come away with some sensual pictures of myself that I really like.

It's unlikely because of how much I dislike my body.

But, I am hopeful.