My Tantric Love ring.

I've taken most of the day to just lay here, get caught up on a show on HULU, and cry.

I think the most ambitious thing I've done today was make myself a sandwich.

My Mystery Person turned out to be someone I know really well. I ended up spilling my guts to her on what I've been so cryptic about here. She now knows the truth behind my sadness, my grief, and my pain.

She gets it.

She also gave me some solid advice on how to Goddess the Fuck Up and not take things so personally.

She's right, you know?

I know she's right. 

Then she told me SELF-CARE and then sent me a recipe for something super easy and really decadent that I already had all the ingredients for.

Someone else tapped in and I also received some additional information, advice, and a rock solid hammer drop asking me to keep my distance from the current situation.

Hello abandonment issues, how may I serve you today?

Then I went and fucked it all up by confessing my insecurity and asking for validation. Because I'm a complete fucking jackhole of an idiot that way.

I'm trying.

I'm doing the best that I can.

Clearly, I fucking suck at this right now, and I have precious little time to get it the hell fucking right.

I have to start being more aggressive about calling on my divinity.

I just don't know how, yet...


          ...


                  ... 


                              ... wait, I got it.

My Tantric Love ring.

That has everything I need.

I have my court hearing for my legal name change at the ass crack of "oh, dear God, is that the sun?" tomorrow... so, I'm not sure when you can expect any sort of an update or an entry of any kind.

I'll try to keep you posted.

Part of me just wants to shut it all the fuck down for now too... 

Ugh.

I do not want this.