Just another day...

I can't believe it's so close to the end of March already.

April 3rd is almost upon me, with all the horror that day will bring without Bran here to celebrate it with me.

I guess I'm okay for the most part.

I actually caught myself smiling more than once yesterday!!

Granted, I was smiling every time I thought of Rain, but we all kind of expected that now didn't we?

Mental Health / Unfuck Yourself:

 - Therapy - The game therapy has been REALLY effective. I know that my improved morning functionality and mood are directly related. I'm probably still not getting the quality of sleep that I need, but I still feel better in the mornings regardless. Ever since I picked up the gaming again, I've been feeling a lot better.

 - Writing - Chapter 6 was finished yesterday! Yes, very exciting! That was the first chapter that I worked on both expansion and story plot points with and I think it went rather well. I’m starting to feel a lot more confident that I'm catching everything I need to catch in regards to my story plot points and structure goals.

One of the more challenging aspects as been the domino effect of scenes and sequels. A scene is goal, conflict, and disaster. Followed buy the sequel of reaction, dilemma, and decision. The decision phase should lead to the next scene goal and the cycle repeats.

Making sure I have those elements in place is what helps me keep readers interested.

Granted, okay, I've been told that the story is already compelling enough even without micro-managing it all out. BUT, why not take the help anyway, right?

I will START chapter 7 today, but I don't expect to get very far. The most important thing for me to do is read it and start my wheels turning on what improvements I can make to it. I know 7 went off the rails a bit with it's subplot. So, I'm hoping to start fixing that next week.

 - Sleep / Fitbit - All in all, I didn't do too bad last night. 7 hours, 55 minutes, 2 times awake, 16 times restless with a grand total of 38 minutes lost to being either awake or restless. I still feel better. So, I'm okay with that.

 - Fur-babies - No visits yesterday.

Physical Health / Unfuck Yourself:

 - Caffeine - Pretty confident I can keep it to 3 today.

Relationships / Family:

 - Bran - There was an increased influx of snaps and calls yesterday. I found out that the radio silence was because he's sick, again. Part of that is where he's living. The space isn't up to code and there's probably mold or some shit in there. The other part is that there are tiny children who spend their days around other tiny children, so there's the 'germ factory' element there.

He mentioned a couple of times that if he were home, he wouldn't be sick. He's probably not wrong. He rarely ever got sick when it was just us.

*sigh*

I don't know.

I lied and told him I loved him.

Again, it's not that I don't. He's done nothing wrong. My heart just can't take the strain of this distance anymore, so it's shutting down to protect itself.

That's probably for the best.

If I've lost the Blue Falcon as a lover, then I have nothing to fall back on to survive the 3rd. So, shutting down is the only option for survival that I have left.

Bran will come home.

Then we'll see.

 - The Unicorn - I have to stuff Ostara eggs today!!  :)

Relationships / Sweeties:

[ If you're a reader and having trouble keeping the code named sweeties straight, look up above this entry and below the header. There's a link to a list of names/bio's there. - this is a work in progress, so if you're a sweetie and you don't see your name listed, don't worry, I'll get to you. ]

 - Recent Encounters - Nothing new to report.

 - Updates on Favorites -

 - Blue Falcon - Nothing new to report.

 - Rain - I messaged him yesterday and apologized for going quiet on him because of the gaming. He didn't even respond. So, I guess he's been busy doing his own thing too.

Relationships / Potentials and Honorable Mentions:

 - The One Timers - Nothing new to report.

 - The Hopefuls - Nothing new to report.

 - Honorable Mentions - Nothing new to report.

Relationships / Former Sweeties:

 - Jasper - Much to my surprise, he checked in yesterday. I guess his housemates were throwing a party and he was hiding out in the laundry room to get away from all the social anxiety inducing people.

The conversation flowed around his new job schedule making it even more unlikely that he'll be back to visit me any time soon. But, he promised me that he's working on it.

I guess I didn't feel much either way. I'm happy to be over him. I really needed to be.

He also said that sex is still an option.

I won't let him do anything that will hurt him. But, I'm comfortable leaving the option open as well.

End Notes:

I guess there's nothing really earth shattering or exciting right now. I'm just living and getting through each day.

I'm pretty sure that's all anyone can ask of me right now.