Writer First World Problems:

I have good news and bad news.

Bad news first: I'm 90% sure I’m not seeing Rain today.

I know… I know… we were all counting on those hugs. We all know how much I needed them.

To be honest, I'm pretty darn sure Rain needed them just as badly. But, there was an accident in Rain's end and someone in his family was seriously injured. It makes all the sense in the world that Rain would put his family first. He hasn't had the kinds of experiences with his family that I've had with mine.

Yes, I’m disappointed.

NO, I don't hold anything against Rain.

I love Rain, and I trust him. I know he'll make time for me soon.

In other good news - there are THREE new blips on the radar!

I know, right?!

So, look for them in the Hopefuls.

Mental Health / Unfuck Yourself:

 - Therapy - I'm still gaming my ass off. I seem to really obsess about it a lot. I really do think it's the best thing for me, though. It keeps me from feeling like I've spent hours alone. Instead I'm spending hours with an online community and I'm making friends. There's really no bad here. These are down-time hours that I would have spent doing nothing anyway. So, why not spend it in a virtual world where I can play a cute little werewolf reaper named after an episode of Supernatural?

 - Writing - Chapter 7 is well underway. The good news is that the story is well fluffed and I'm meeting my word count goals. The BAD news is that two of my crits on the original chapter 7 both suggested the same place where back story would be crucial.

SHIT.

I'm not even sure where I can fit that back story into act one… but, I feel like I should try.

This MAY mean raising my final word count goal, again!

This would also mean going back and re-adding more to the chapters I've already fluffed.

ACK!

Writer first world problems.

 - Sleep / Fitbit - Not bad for getting to bed late. 7 hours, 50 minutes, 1x awake, 30x restless (jeez that's high!), total of 30 minutes awake/restless.

 - Fur-babies - One visit from Dreamy yesterday. Both the Unicorn and I got some kisses and cuddles in.

Physical Health / Unfuck Yourself:

 - Caffeine - I'm keeping it to 3 again. SCREW YOU ADDICTION!

Relationships / Family:

 - Bran - I came clean with the Unicorn last night. I told her about how I was feeling / not feeling about Bran.

Did I ever tell you that she can see 'cords'? Especially heart cords?

Yeah. Total Kabbalah Tree of Life level, she can SEE the emotional/mental/spiritual ties between people. She can tell by the color, shape, intensity, etc… she can tell how strong certain bonds are.

She's always seen my heart cord to Bran as strong and bright glowing pink.

Now she can see that it's starting to turn black.

Fuck me.

I don't want this.

I just wish he'd come home.

I can't take this anymore.

I just can't.

 - The Unicorn - As always, our weekends together are a special time, for both of us. She kept me up late last night talking about spiritual stuff with me. That's one really special, unique bond that we will always share. This way we have of being able to see, hear, and feel things in the spiritual world.

Did I ever tell you that she has split personalities too?

Yeah, and they're all in her head, just like mine. They all take turns being the speaking voice at times.

It's like the most natural thing in the world for us to have these fragmented minds. I can see how other people would find it disorientating. But, for us… it's just the way we're programmed and we love it. We'd never have it any other way.

You wanna know the other thing I really love about her?

I made some hamburger helper last night and she came back for 2 helpings. She told me that she thinks I’m a really good cook.

*warm sigh*

Cooking for people is a passion of mine.

It's interesting. For years I waited for someone to watch Supernatural with me… and she filled that role. Which, she's actually going to do AGAIN as soon as we're done with the Buffy/Angel'verse. Granted, I have Rain for that now too, but it's still sweet!

Anyway.

Bran used to eat my cooking, sometimes. But after awhile, he stopped. Every once in awhile I can get a sweetie to eat my cooking. But, sometimes they hold back too.

The Unicorn? Man, she really loves my cooking. She totally gives me that sense of pride that I've nourished a body and done something loving for someone.

I was going to make chicken and dumplings for Rain today, and the chicken is already thawed. I seriously reconsidered when Rain pulled back. But, then I thought 'HEY! The Unicorn has never had Chicken and Dumplings'. So, fuck it! I'm going to make it for her!  :)

Relationships / Sweeties:

[ If you're a reader and having trouble keeping the code named sweeties straight, look up above this entry and below the header. There's a link to a list of names/bio's there. - this is a work in progress, so if you're a sweetie and you don't see your name listed, don't worry, I'll get to you. ]

 - Recent Encounters - Watch this section, there will be updates soon.

 - Updates on Favorites -

 - Blue Falcon - Nothing new to report.

 - Rain - This you already know…

I love and miss you, Rain.

Relationships / Potentials and Honorable Mentions:

 - The One Timers - Nothing new to report.

 - The Hopefuls - Okay, so three dates this coming week. Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. It's the Friday one that has me the MOST excited. But, I'm sure I'll make more updates on the others soon'ish. 

Friday: He's tall, pale, and scrawny. Super cute. In a very long term, open relationship. He' gets seriously rough with his girlfriend when they have sex. They're both really deep into rape play.

Can we say 'law of attraction?'

I lost Jasper, the only guy who meant it when he pinned me down, and then this guy shows up?

Seriously. Please wish me luck on this one.

We all know just how badly I need someone who isn't afraid to break me.

 - Honorable Mentions - There's a guy I've been chatting with from OKC. We did take it to text. He checked in on me last night. We hadn't texted since January. Not sure if that will ever develop into a thing. He always seems too stressed and busy.

Relationships / Former Sweeties:

 - Jasper - I did check on him. I received no reply.

*shrug*

Whatever.

End Notes:

I want Bran home. Falling out of love with him is killing me.

I'm sad about the high likelihood that I've already lost the Blue Falcon.

I miss and love Rain.

I have a new 'possibility'… there's a good chance that Friday might turn out to be a favorite sweetie.

LOL… shit…

I think I just gave him his code name.